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Assalamuaalaikum,
الجواب وبالله التوفيق
One should have kind and loving behavior in the Tarbiyah of the children. Having anger, scolding, and punishing all the time create negative emotions in the children. Especially when the child is only three years old one should have a soft, kind, and loving behavior. The love and kindness for the children demands to give anything to the younger children first.
A mother came to Hazrat Aeshah R.A. with her two daughters to ask for some food. At that time Hazrat Aeshah R.A. had a date only and didn’t have anything else. She gave the same to the mother who made two pieces of the date and gave to her two daughters and herself didn’t eat anything and left. When Nabi S.A.W. came home Hazrat Aeshah R.A. narrated the whole story to him. Nabi S.A.W. said that having kind and good behavior towards her daughters is a source of protection from hellfire for her.
(Riyad-us-Saliheen, Hadith 270, Chapter ملاطقۃ الشیم الخ)
واللہ اعلم بالصواب