Assalamu-alaykum, 

With great pain and heavy heart, I have to write this and describe the issues I face. I could not go to anyone here in USA, all our immediate family is in India and we could not trouble them with what we face.

I sincerely seek help and I plead someone elder or scholar to please help us. 

We are married for 15.5 years, have two children that we love very dearly (8 year girl and 2 year boy,we are 38). But between us we never found peace and bliss that a good marriage brings. From my perspective as husband, I have very hard issues with some of the behavior and comments passed on to me by wife's relatives and in reaction, we had great arguments and I felt very rejected, never loved and understood, my reaction because of this feelings might have made wife sad. She sometimes threatened to harm herself, but I could not do anything and don't know what I can do. This same kind of things happens very often. We are living in very delicate situation day to day, and not sure how it can get improved. I have lost all the feelings.

Other very tragic thing happened today, in the fight, wife asked she wants to leave, for which I said yes and she said if she gets divorce then she will leave. I told her one time Islamic divorce (talaq). Now, we don't know what is legal sharia way to move forward. We don't know how can we live together. I myself, prefer to separate, but I could not force it, as I understand how difficult it will be for a separated woman to live here. I also have high concern for my kids, which I love and could not live without. But at the same time, I can not live like this and very sure it is creating troubles for all of us.

Can someone please help us and guide us?